Chapter Five of the book The Origin of Ratha-yātrā, by Śrīla Bhaktivedānta Nārāyaṇa Mahārāja

 

At the beginning of the Ratha-yātrā Festival, Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu offers a prayer to Jagannātha-deva, not to His form as Lord Jagannātha or Vāsudeva-Kṛṣṇa, but to His form as Vrajendra-nandana Śrī Kṛṣṇa:

jayati jana-nivāso devakī-janma-vādo
yadu-vara-pariṣat svair dorbhir asyann adharmam
sthira-cara-vṛjina-ghnaḥ su-smita-śrī-mukhena
vraja-pura-vanitānāṁ vardhayan kāma-devam

Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam (10.90.48)

[“Lord Śrī Kṛṣṇa is He who is known as jana-nivāsa, the ultimate resort of all living entities, and who is also known as Devakīnandana or Yaśodā-nandana, the son of Devakī and Yaśodā. He is the guide of the Yadu dynasty, and with His mighty arms He kills everything inauspicious, as well as every man who is impious. By His presence He destroys all things inauspicious for all living entities, moving and inert. His blissful smiling face always increases the lusty desires of the gopīs of Vṛndāvana. May He be all glorious and happy!”]

Caitanya Mahāprabhu is praying in the mood of Śrīmatī Rādhikā meeting Kṛṣṇa at Kurukṣetra. There, by their mood, the gopīs bring Kṛṣṇa to Vṛndāvana and decorate Him with flowers. By their mood, they forcibly give Him the flute He left in Vṛndāvana with Mother Yaśodā, along with His peacock feather, and they whisper in His ear, “Don’t say that Your father and mother are Vasudeva and Devakī. Don’t say that You are from the Yadu dynasty and a Yādava. Say only that You are a gopa.” Kṛṣṇa replies, “Yes, I will follow your instructions.”

Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu prays, jayati jana-nivāso devakī-janma-vādo. This śloka, which Śrī Sanātana Gosvāmī has quoted in his Bṛhad-bhāgavatāmṛta, has many profound meanings. If Caitanya Mahāprabhu or Śrīla Sanātana Gosvāmī were to explain it, they would do so with a hundred different meanings, each deeper and more unfathomable than the previous one. It contains the entire Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam from beginning to end.

The general meaning of jana-nivāsa is, “You are always in the hearts of all as Paramātmā.” However, Kṛṣṇa cannot live as Paramātmā in the hearts of the Vrajavāsīs; He can only be present there in the form of Vrajendra-nandana Śyāmasundara. Jana also means nija-jana (near and dear); therefore, it means Kṛṣṇa’s personal associates. All the Vrajavāsīs are Kṛṣṇa’s nija-jana, for He is the jīvana (life-air) of Nanda, Yaśodā, all His friends, and especially of the gopīs. He is also rādhikā-jīvanera jīvana, the very life of Rādhikā’s life, and He always resides in Her heart. This relationship is reciprocal; the Vrajavāsīs are His life, just as much as He is theirs.

Devakī-janma-vādo. Only Mathurāvāsīs and worldly people can say that Kṛṣṇa took birth from the womb of Mother Devakī. General people say this, but actually He is the son of Mother Yaśodā; she is His real mother.

Yadu-vara-pariṣat svair dorbhir. The members of the Yadu dynasty are the nija-jana of Dvārakādhīśa-Kṛṣṇa, for they are His associates. It seems that this śloka refers to Vāsudeva-Kṛṣṇa, and describes Arjuna, Bhīma, and His other associates as His arms. Vāsudeva-Kṛṣṇa fought in the Mahābhārata War and various other battles, and He fought with Pauṇḍraka Vāsudeva and other demons. The śloka seems to describe dvārakā-līlā, but actually, in its deeper meaning, it glorifies Vrajendra-nandana Kṛṣṇa. In Vṛndāvana, Kṛṣṇa killed Pūtanā and other demons with his own arms. Moreover, in Vṛndāvana, He killed the greatest demon – the feelings of separation felt by Śrīmatī Rādhikā and the gopīs.

Sthira-cara-vṛjina-ghnaḥ su-smita-śrī-mukhena vraja-pura-vanitānām. In Vṛndāvana, Kṛṣṇa always took away all kinds of problems and suffering, simply with His smiling face and His flute. What was the suffering of the Vrajavāsīs? It was only their mood of separation from Him. They had no other problems at all.

This verse includes the pastimes of Gokula, Vṛndāvana, Rādhā-kuṇḍa, Śyāma-kuṇḍa, rāsa-līlā, and all the other Vraja pastimes as well. Vardhayan kāmadevam. In this connection, Kāmadeva does not mean lust, but prema. What kind of prema? Sneha, māna, praṇaya, rāga, anurāga, bhāva, and mahābhāva. The gopīs tell Kṛṣṇa, “You are that person – that Kāmadeva.” In this way, Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu is offering praṇāma and praying, putting the whole of Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam, and all of Kṛṣṇa’s pastimes as well, into this one śloka.

As I have explained, Mahāprabhu rarely sees Jagannātha, Baladeva, and Subhadrā. When He does, He at once enters a mood of very intense separation and prays, “After a long time I am meeting with My most beloved, for whom I was burning in the fire of separation.” He addresses Jagannātha as gopī-bhartuḥ and prays, “Pada-kamalayor dāsa-dāsānudāsaḥ.” The word gopī-bhartuḥ reveals Kṛṣṇa’s relationship with the gopīs, for it means “the gopīs’ most beloved,” or “He who is always controlled by the gopīs.” Mahāprabhu concludes, “I want to be the servant of the servant of the servant of that Kṛṣṇa.”

nāhaṁ vipro na ca nara-patir nāpi vaiśyo na śūdro
nāhaṁ varṇī na ca gṛha-patir no vanastho yatir vā
kintu prodyan-nikhila-paramānanda-pūrnāmṛtābdher
gopī-bhartuḥ pada-kamalayor dāsa-dāsānudāsaḥ

Śrī Caitanya-caritāmṛta (Madhya-līlā 13.80)

[“I am not a brāhmaṇa, I am not a kṣatriya, I am not a vaiśya or a śūdra. Nor am I a brahmacārī, a householder, a vānaprastha or a sannyāsī. I identify Myself only as the servant of the servant of the servant of the lotus feet of Lord Śrī Kṛṣṇa, the maintainer of the gopīs. He is like an ocean of nectar, and He is the cause of universal transcendental bliss. He is always existing with brilliance.”]

Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu prays not only for Himself, but for everyone. He is the Supreme Personality of Godhead, gopī-bhartuḥ Himself, and He offers prayers to teach us how to pray. He is teaching us our actual identity; we are not Indian or American, nor are we from Great Britain or anywhere else. We are not brāhmaṇas, administrative kṣatriyas, mercantile vaiśyas or śūdra labourers, nor are we brahmacārī students, gṛhastha householders, retired vānaprasthas, or sannyāsīs in the renounced order. We are eternally servants of Kṛṣṇa.

Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu uses the name gopī-bhartuḥ for further clarification, and by this, He is indicating, “We are not servants of that Kṛṣṇa who lived here and there in Dvārakā without His flute. Others may be, but as for My associates and Myself, we are only gopī-bhartuḥ pada-kamalayor dāsa-dāsānudāsaḥ, the servants of the servants of the servants of the lotus feet of Śrī Kṛṣṇa, the beloved of the gopīs.”

Who is gopī-bhartuḥ? He is Rādhā-kānta, Rādhā-ramaṇa, and Gopīnātha. The gopīs must be there as the ārādhya (worshipable deities) of Kṛṣṇa. He must be their worshiper, and then we are His servants; otherwise not. We are not Kṛṣṇa’s servants if Rukmiṇī and Satyabhāmā are there, or if He is four-handed and holding His Sudarśana cakra. Kṛṣṇa must be with the gopīs; He must be controlled by their prominence, and especially by Rādhā. We are servants of that Kṛṣṇa.

We are all transcendental, and our intrinsic, constitutional nature is to serve Kṛṣṇa, but we are not servants of all His manifestations. There are very big differences in these manifestations, and to be the servant of gopī-bhartuḥ is very, very rare. We can consider that those who have come in the line of Mahāprabhu are rādhā-dāsīs, as gopī-bhartuḥ pada-kamalayor dāsadāsānudāsaḥ only applies to the maidservants of Rādhikā. Caitanya Mahāprabhu’s statement, therefore, refers to those who are coming in His disciplic line, those who are coming in the line of Śrīla Rūpa Gosvāmī, Śrīla Raghunātha dāsa Gosvāmī, and our entire guru-paramparā. One day, if our creeper of bhakti blossoms and the fruits and flowers of prema-bhakti manifest, we will be able to realise this. This is the aim and object of our life.

Mahāprabhu was so absorbed that He could not utter Jagannātha’s name. He could only chant, “Jaja gaga! Jaja gaga!” Tears fell from His eyes, and His heart melted. One can realise this state only if one is a devotee of the highest standard. What was the cause of Mahāprabhu’s bitter weeping? What was the reason behind it? Mahāprabhu told Svarūpa Dāmodara to sing a song that suited His mood, and Svarūpa Dāmodara began to sing:

sei ta parāṇa-nātha pāinu
yāhā lāgi’ madana-dahane jhuri’ genu

Śrī Caitanya-caritāmṛta (Madhya-līlā 13.113)

[“Now I have gained the Lord of My life, in the absence of whom I was being burned by Cupid and was withering away.”]

You will have to consult Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam to understand the meaning of this verse, because the history of Ratha-yātrā has been indicated there. Kṛṣṇa left Vraja at the age of eleven* and went first to Mathurā, and then after some time, He went to Dvārakā. While He was in Mathurā, He sent Uddhava to console the gopīs, and later He also sent Baladeva Prabhu from Dvārakā to console them. The gopīs had now been feeling separation for a long time. Everyone in Vṛndāvana was feeling separation from Him, and even the cows and calves were upset. The gopas and gopīs were weeping continuously, and everyone, including the entire forest of Vṛndāvana, was drying up.

When Kṛṣṇa was sending Uddhava from Mathurā, He told him, “Uddhava, go to Vṛndāvana and pacify My father and mother, Nanda and Yaśodā, and especially pacify the gopīs who have given Me their life and soul and everything they possess. The gopīs always remember Me, and they do nothing else. They never decorate themselves, and they have even given up taking their meals. They don’t bathe, and they don’t even sleep.”

mac-cittā mad-gata-prāṇā
bodhayantaḥ parasparam
kathayantaś ca māṁ nityaṁ
tuṣyanti ca ramanti ca

Bhagavad-gītā (10.9)

[“The thoughts of My pure devotees dwell in Me, their lives are fully devoted to My service, and they derive great satisfaction and bliss from always enlightening one another and conversing about Me.”]

The gopīs’ only relief from their feelings of separation came when they sometimes fainted and slept. However, even these two friends – fainting and sleeping – abandoned the gopīs when Kṛṣṇa took them with Him to Mathurā.

In this way, Kṛṣṇa sent Uddhava to Vraja, and there Uddhava related His message, word by word, letter by letter. However, this only made the gopīs more unhappy. Previously, they had thought, “Kṛṣṇa has promised that He will come,” but after hearing the message, they thought, “Kṛṣṇa will never come,” and they felt even more separation. Śrīmatī Rādhārāṇī began to weep:

he nātha he ramā-nātha
vraja-nāthārti-nāśana
magnam uddhara govinda
gokulaṁ vṛjinārṇavāt

Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam (10.47.52)

[“O master, O master of the goddess of fortune, O master of Vraja! O destroyer of all suffering, Govinda, please lift Your Gokula out of the ocean of distress in which it is drowning!”]

Śrīmatī Rādhikā said, “I am dying without Kṛṣṇa. My dear sakhīs, if Kṛṣṇa does not come, I will die; I will surely die. Take My body, place it at the base of a tamāla tree, and put My arms around that tree so that I may feel connected to Kṛṣṇa. I pray that the water in My body will mix with Pāvana-sarovara where Kṛṣṇa bathes, so that I may touch Him. Let the air in this body go to Nanda Bābā’s courtyard and touch Kṛṣṇa when He is fanned. May the fire in this body become rays of sunshine in Nanda Bābā’s courtyard, and then My soul will be happy. Now I cannot see Kṛṣṇa, or touch Him.” She was in a very pitiful condition, always in a mood of deep separation.

Kṛṣṇa was also feeling unbearable separation, but no one knew that. The gopīs could share their suffering, but Kṛṣṇa could not share His feelings with anyone. He wept alone. This is why He sent Uddhava to Vṛndāvana; He wanted Uddhava to be admitted into the school of the gopīs, so that he would learn the meaning of the two-and-a-half letters in the word prema.** Kṛṣṇa considered, “When Uddhava understands the love of the gopīs, he will be qualified to realise My feelings of separation.”

When Uddhava returned from Vraja, he told Kṛṣṇa about the glories of the gopīs and their one-pointed love. He said, “It is so very high that I could not touch it. I only saw that mountain of love from a great distance, but it was still so high that my hat fell off my head as I looked up. I cannot imagine how glorious the gopīs are. I wanted to take the dust of their lotus feet, but now I am hopeless. I am not qualified to touch their foot-dust, so I offer praṇāma to it from very far away. Uddhava then uttered the following prayer in glorification of the gopīs:

vande nanda-vraja-strīṇāṁ
pāda-reṇum abhīkṣṇaśaḥ
yāsāṁ hari-kathodgītaṁ
punāti bhuvana-trayam

Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam (10.47.63)

[“I repeatedly offer my respects to the dust from the feet of the women of Nanda Mahārāja’s cowherd village. When these gopīs loudly chant the glories of Śrī Kṛṣṇa, the vibration purifies the three worlds.”]

Instead of becoming pacified by Uddhava’s explanation, Kṛṣṇa felt more and more separation. He wanted to go to Vraja, but for some reason, He could not.

Kṛṣṇa had told Uddhava, “My father and mother are weeping bitterly. They have become blind, and they are hardly more than skeletons. Perhaps they will only live for one or two days more; in fact, they may die at any moment. Please go and pacify them. And go also to the gopīs. I know that My father and mother are weeping bitterly, that they are blind, and may die… but I don’t know what the condition of the gopīs is. They are feeling the topmost separation for Me. I don’t know whether they are alive or if they have already died; so go at once, quickly. They always remember Me, keeping Me on the chariots of their minds, without any selfish motive. They know that nobody in Mathurā knows My heart.”

The gopīs know that Kṛṣṇa is very shy, and cannot ask anyone for something to eat when He feels hungry. Yaśodā-maiyā is not present in His palace; so who will pacify Him, and who will serve Him? This is why the gopīs feel so much separation.

Kṛṣṇa had told Uddhava, “The gopīs are mat-prāṇa, My life and soul.” He had not said this about His father and mother, only about the gopīs. He continued, “They have left everything for Me. For My sake, they have stopped caring for their bodies and have forgotten all their bodily duties. I am their only beloved; they are My most beloved, my life and soul. They have left their shyness and their worldly responsibilities, and they have also abandoned all social etiquette for Me. For My sake, they have disobeyed their parents and left their source of maintenance. I must somehow save them and maintain them. Now they are far away, thinking, ‘Kṛṣṇa will surely come tomorrow. If we die now, He will die when He finds out.’ This is the reason they somehow maintain their lives without dying.

“The gopīs think, ‘Kṛṣṇa has promised, and He cannot break His promise. He must come. He will come tomorrow.’ That is why they maintain their lives. Actually, I think that they are not maintaining their own lives. Their lives rest in Me, and I maintain them; otherwise, they would have been finished. Go at once and see whether they have died or not; and if not, please pacify them.”

Kṛṣṇa had only spoken like this about the gopīs; never about anyone else, including Arjuna and the Pāṇḍavas, or His queens, Satyabhāmā and Rukmiṇī. The gopīs are unique in their boundless and causeless love and affection for Kṛṣṇa. Our highest aim and object is the love for Kṛṣṇa that is in the gopīs, and especially in Rādhikā.

When Rādhikā was feeling separation, gopīs like Lalitā, Viśākhā, Citrā, Campakalatā, and Rūpa Mañjarī were serving Her and trying to pacify Her; but who could actually pacify Her? She was wholly mad, with no external sense at all. The others tried to pacify Her because their consciousness was still somewhat functional. Their love is very high, millions of times greater than that of Uddhava, Satyabhāmā, and Rukmiṇī, and higher even than that of the other sakhīs of Vṛndāvana; but it is not as high as Rādhikā’s love.

Rādhikā was wholly mad, as Uddhava saw when he witnessed Her talking to the bumblebee. Actually, Kṛṣṇa Himself had gone to Vraja in the form of that bumblebee, and He also saw that Rādhikā was wholly mad. She was lying on a bed of rose petals, which had become dried up by the touch of Her body, and all the candana put on Her body to cool Her was also completely dried. At first, Uddhava could not understand whether She was dead or alive.

Then, he saw that Rādhikā was very angry with Kṛṣṇa, criticising and abusing Him, and calling Him an ungrateful cheater. No one else could have spoken to Kṛṣṇa in this way, including Satyabhāmā and the other queens, and even Mother Yaśodā and Nanda Bābā. Rādhikā told Him, “You are ungrateful, and You are like a six-legged bumblebee. Humans have two legs and animals have four, but bumblebees have six legs, so they are more ignorant than any animal. We don’t want to have any relationship with that black person whose heart is as black as a bumblebee. Rāma was also black, and he cheated Śūrpaṇakhā and cut off her nose and ears.”

Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam is actually an explanation of the glory of Rādhikā’s love. Her love is supreme and the goal of all living beings. We can never grasp its breadth, but we can taste a drop of it, and even that one drop can drown the entire universe. Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu gave Śrīla Rūpa Gosvāmī that drop of the endless ocean of nectar, bhakti-rasa. If we can serve the gopīs, and especially Rādhikā, we can also have love and affection for Kṛṣṇa, and then we can feel separation. Otherwise, it will never be possible. Caitanya Mahāprabhu, the Six Gosvāmīs, Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam, and Śukadeva Gosvāmī have proclaimed this conclusion: our goal is kṛṣṇa-prema, the prema that the gopīs have for Kṛṣṇa.

Previously, Uddhava had heard about how much love and affection the gopīs have for Kṛṣṇa, but he had no experience of it. He had heard that the gopīs are Kṛṣṇa’s most beloved, and that Kṛṣṇa is their most beloved, but even knowing this, he could not know the intensity and the ways of their love.

Uddhava also loves Kṛṣṇa and thinks, “Kṛṣṇa is my master. He is also like my brother; we have many other relationships.” However, Kṛṣṇa did not say anything about Uddhava’s love. Rather, He told him to go to Vraja and learn there: “Go and realise the nature of prema.” He said, “There is no one in Mathurā like these gopīs.”

Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu has mercifully sprinkled a drop of that love on the world (Śrī Caitanya-caritāmṛta (Ādi-līlā 1.4)):

anarpita-carīṁ cirāt karuṇayāvatīrṇaḥ kalau
samarpayitum unnatojjvala-rasāṁ sva-bhakti-śriyam
hariḥ puraṭa-sundara-dyuti-kadamba-sandīpitaḥ
sadā hṛdaya-kandare sphuratu vaḥ śacī-nandanaḥ

[“May the Supreme Lord who is known as the son of Śrīmatī Śacī-devī be transcendentally situated in the innermost chambers of your heart. Resplendent with the radiance of molten gold, He has appeared in the Age of Kali by His causeless mercy to bestow what no incarnation has ever offered before: the most sublime and radiant mellow of devotional service, the mellow of conjugal love.”]

Uddhava had great love and affection for Kṛṣṇa, but when he arrived in Vraja, he realised that vraja-prema was utterly new to him. He saw Kṛṣṇa playing with all His sakhās. Millions and millions of cows were hankering after Him, and milk was flowing from their bulging udders because of their spontaneous love. The very beautiful black and white calves were jumping here and there, and Nanda Bābā’s big bulls were fighting each other.

As Uddhava saw that scene, beautiful ghee lamps flickered in the gopīs’ rooms, and the light from these lamps was soft and fragrant, unlike the dead light from electric bulbs. Varieties of flowers spread their sweet aroma in all directions, and the songs of the humming bumblebees were like the blowing of Cupid’s conchshell. Cuckoos and other birds sang everywhere, and peacocks danced about and called, “Ke kaw! Ke kaw!”

All the gopīs were churning yoghurt and singing, “Govinda Dāmodara Mādhaveti.” They were all very beautiful, and Mother Yaśodā was the most beautiful. How else could Kṛṣṇa have become so beautiful? He would only have been black otherwise; His beauty was like the lustre of pearls because of her.

Uddhava saw all this, but in a moment the scene changed completely, and now he saw that all the residents of Vṛndāvana were weeping for Kṛṣṇa: “O Kṛṣṇa, where are You? Where are You?” Cows were not going out to graze. They wept, keeping their heads and eyes toward Mathurā, and the calves were not drinking the milk from their mothers’ udders. The peacocks were not dancing; they looked like they were blind. Every person and creature was mad in separation from Kṛṣṇa.

It was now evening, and Uddhava found himself in Kṛṣṇa’s home, where he became dumbstruck to see the love and affection of Mother Yaśodā and Nanda Bābā. He could never have imagined that such high-class love could exist, but now he realised something of its elevated nature.

Early the next morning, Uddhava went to Kadamba-kyārī, where, by Kṛṣṇa’s mercy, he was able to see the gopīs, who were all mad in separation and just about to die. This is why Kṛṣṇa had sent him to Vṛndāvana: to try to be admitted into the school of the gopīs. Kṛṣṇa had told him, “Be admitted into the school where I studied. Then, when you return, we will be able to have some discussion about love and affection. First, go and become qualified.”

However, Uddhava was not qualified for admittance into the school of the gopīs. His entrance examination score was about 25 percent, but the gopīs demanded more than 85 percent. Still, although they rejected him, he could enter the school and see the very high-class students there. He saw professors like Viśākhā and Lalitā, and he saw the principal, Rādhikā Herself. Now he knew something of the glories of the gopīs, and he realised a little of their love for Kṛṣṇa. He had never seen anything like this before, and now he felt, “If I want to love Kṛṣṇa, I must be admitted into this school. But I am not qualified.” He therefore requested the gopīs, “If you do not admit me, can you at least take me on as a servant, to bring water and clean the school?” The gopīs rejected even that request, however, and they told him, “You should go back to Mathurā. First, become qualified, and then you can sweep our kuñjas; now, you cannot sweep here.”

Uddhava then prayed:

vande nanda-vraja-strīṇāṁ
pāda-reṇum abhīkṣṇaśaḥ
yāsāṁ hari-kathodgītaṁ
punāti bhuvana-trayam

Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam (10.47.63)

[“I repeatedly offer my respects to the dust from the feet of the women of Nanda Mahārāja’s cowherd village. When these gopīs loudly chant the glories of Śrī Kṛṣṇa, the vibration purifies the three worlds.”]

Nanda-vraja-strīṇām means the beloved gopīs of Kṛṣṇa. Uddhava prayed to them, “I want to offer myself unto the dust of your lotus feet. I want to keep even one particle of your foot-dust on my head, and if I can only get one particle of dust, it must be Śrīmatī Rādhikā’s.” Neither Brahmā nor Śaṅkara, nor even Satyabhāmā and the other Dvārakā queens, can attain this.

Kṛṣṇa had sent Uddhava to see the glories of the gopīs, and now he saw Mount Everest, the highest peak of the Himālayas of the gopīs’ love. He could not become like them, however, so he had to return to Kṛṣṇa empty-handed. “I went there and saw something very mysterious and wonderful, which I cannot explain,” he told Kṛṣṇa. “You told me about the gopīs, and what I saw was even more wonderful than what You told me. But I had to return without realising anything.”

Yāsāṁ hari-kathodgītaṁ, punāti bhuvana-trayam. The songs of the gopīs, such as Bhramara-gīta and Gopī-gīta, purify the whole universe, and if one recites them, or even remembers them, he will actually be purified. So try to recite all these songs (gītas) and know them. The meanings are very deep, and Śrīla Bhaktivedānta Svāmī Mahārāja wanted to teach that the very wonderful moods therein are our aim and object. He wanted to teach this and discussed it in his books, but how could he plant it in barren lands and deserts? First, he had to cultivate the lands to make them fertile. He wanted to give this highest goal, but in the meantime, his Svāminī, Śrīmatī Rādhikā, called to him, “Come at once! We need your service.”

This is our goal – the dust of the lotus feet of Śrīmatī Rādhikā.

āsām aho caraṇa-reṇu-juṣām ahaṁ syāṁ
vṛndāvane kim api gulma-latauṣadhīnām
yā dustyajaṁ sva-janam ārya-pathaṁ ca hitvā
bhejur mukunda-padavīṁ śrutibhir vimṛgyām

Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam (10.47.61)

[“The gopīs of Vṛndāvana have given up the association of their husbands, sons and other family members, who are very difficult to give up, and they have forsaken the path of chastity to take shelter of the lotus feet of Mukunda, Kṛṣṇa, which one should search for by Vedic knowledge. Oh, let me be fortunate enough to be one of the bushes, creepers or herbs in Vṛndāvana, because the gopīs trample them and bless them with the dust of their lotus feet.”]

Uddhava prayed, “If I cannot attain Rādhikā’s lotus feet, then I will be satisfied with the dust particles from the feet of any of Her sakhīs. I don’t want the dust of Kṛṣṇa’s lotus feet, because I will have to take a particle of the gopīs’ moods if I want to please Kṛṣṇa.”

We must engage in the process given by Śrīla Rūpa Gosvāmī, Śrīla Bhaktivinoda Ṭhākura, Śrīla Viśvanātha Cakravartī Ṭhākura, and Śrīla Narottama dāsa Ṭhākura. The teaching of our present ācāryas is the same wine in new bottles. The bottles are different colours, but the wine is the same. If you drink that wine, you will undoubtedly become mad, but this madness is actually desirable.

Years later, there was to be a solar eclipse, and Kṛṣṇa planned to go to Kurukṣetra with all His commanders, His army, and all His 16,108 queens. He did not invite Nanda Bābā directly, but He thought, “Father will know, and he will not be able to remain in Vraja. He will come at once; he must come.”

In Vṛndāvana, Nanda Bābā somehow came to know about the religious function to be held at Kurukṣetra. Thus, all the gopas, gopīs, and young people prepared their bullock carts and proceeded toward Kurukṣetra, leaving Upananda and some other elders in Vraja to look after everything. They took with them many personal items for Kṛṣṇa, such as butter and other things that He liked, and on the way, they constantly remembered: “Kṛṣṇa, Kṛṣṇa, Kṛṣṇa.”

By then, the gopīs had been lamenting for perhaps fifty, sixty, or seventy years. Kṛṣṇa also felt separation for that long, but even after all those years, He was still youthful (kiśora), and the gopīs remained young as well.

In the meantime, the sun was covered by a shadow, and the whole world became dark. According to Vedic culture, during a solar eclipse, one should take a bath three times: when it is just beginning, when the sun is fully covered, and when it is again fully visible. At that time, one should bathe and give donations in charity. It is written in Indian history and in the Vedas and Upaniṣads that many kings used to donate their entire wealth to the brāhmaṇas and needy persons. Every golden pot and utensil was given in charity. Having given away their own clothing, keeping only a loincloth for themselves, the kings would become penniless. Those people gave so much charity that no one could take it anymore. Those who had accepted charity began to give charity to others. They gave their charity in charity; therefore, no one was left to think, “I want charity.” All were giving and all were satisfied – because Kṛṣṇa was there. Even recently, in India, many people have donated all these things. However, although giving in charity is for the betterment of the donors, this culture is gradually reducing.

Everyone bathed there at Kurukṣetra, made their donations, and after that, they came to Kṛṣṇa’s tent to take His darśana. Thousands and thousands of ṛṣis, maharṣis, brahmavādīs, realised souls like Nārada, Bhīṣma Pitāmaha (the grandfather of the Kauravas and Pāṇḍavas), Vyāsadeva, Gautama, Yājñavalkya, Duryodhana, and all his brothers, Droṇācārya, Karṇa, and all the Kauravas came from all over India, and from all over the world. Ṛṣis and maharṣis from the Caspian sea, like Kaśyapa, also came, and from Mongolia, sages like Maṅgala Ṛṣi came with all his sons and daughters. Almost all the world’s kings had assembled there to bathe in the very pious lake, and the crowd consisted of more than ten million people. All were there to bathe in that lake and resided in separate camps.

Now, everyone assembled in the camp of Vasudeva and Devakī to take darśana of Kṛṣṇa, and they began to enter His tent. His tent was so large that thousands of people could sit inside. Although there was no arrangement for a loudspeaker, everyone could easily hear Him speak, and in fact, everyone thought, “Kṛṣṇa is sitting near me. I’m joking with Him and telling Him something, and He is very happy to hear it.”

The Pāṇḍavas – Yudhiṣṭhira, Arjuna, Bhīma, Nakula, Sahadeva, and Draupadī – had also joined the assembly, and their mother, Kuntī, was also there. Kuntī met with her brother Vasudeva, and pitifully weeping with tears falling profusely from her eyes, she told him, “Brother, you did not remember me when my sons were given poison, when they were about to burn in a fire, or when all their wealth, kingdom, and everything else was taken and we were begging here and there. Like a demon, Duryodhana cheated my sons. He drove them from their kingdom, and he and Duḥśāsana also tried to strip Draupadī in the big council where Dhṛtarāṣṭra, Bhīṣma Pitāmaha, and other elders were present. You are my brother. You should have remembered me.” Weeping loudly, she put her arms around Vasudeva’s neck, and Vasudeva Mahārāja began to weep. Kuntī continued, “Perhaps, my brother, you forgot me.”

Vasudeva replied, “O elder sister, please do not lament. This was all caused by the time factor of Śrī Bhagavān. At that time, my wife and I were imprisoned in the jail of Kaṁsa, and we were suffering so grievously. Kaṁsa was constantly abusing and insulting us. His men bound me in iron chains, and they were kicking me with their boots. How could I do anything? Moreover, our six sons were killed right in front of us, snatched from my lap and put to death. Luckily, Baladeva and Kṛṣṇa are saved. I was in unbearable distress, and that is why I could not help you. Nevertheless, despite everything, somehow I always remembered you, and when I came out of jail, I sent my first message to you.

“Everything depends on the mercy of God. Sometimes we meet, and sometimes we are separated from each other. Sometimes there is suffering and sorrow, and sometimes we are very prosperous. Nothing depends on any soul. Don’t worry anymore. Now it is over.” In this way, Vasudeva was consoling Kuntī.

In the meantime, Nanda Bābā and the Vrajavāsīs were coming on many bullock carts. Mother Yaśodā, Nanda Bābā, all the gopīs like Śrīmatī Rādhikā, Lalitā, and Viśākhā, and all Kṛṣṇa’s cowherd friends like Dāmā, Śrīdāmā, Sudāmā, Vasudāma, Stoka-kṛṣṇa, Madhumaṅgala, and all others were on their way. Thousands of gopas and gopīs were on their way to Kṛṣṇa.

While everyone else was meeting with Kṛṣṇa, someone came and told Him and Baladeva, “Oh, Your father and mother are coming in a bullock cart.” When Kṛṣṇa heard this, He immediately left all the assembly members. Although there were many thousands upon thousands of devotees, like Kaśyapa, Kavi, Havi, Antarikṣa, Nārada, Vasiṣṭha, Āgastya, and Vālmīki, Kṛṣṇa left them all and began to run at once towards Yaśodā and Nanda, weeping with tears in His eyes. His heart had melted in one second, and now He called, “Oh, Mother is coming? Father is coming?” Upset, He cried out, “Mother, where are you?”

The bullock cart had now stopped. Baladeva Prabhu was following Kṛṣṇa, and they both exclaimed, “Oh, the bullock cart is here.” Nanda Bābā and Yaśodā-maiyā came down from the cart, and when they saw Kṛṣṇa, they became overwhelmed and began to weep, “O my son, my son! Kṛṣṇa, Kṛṣṇa!”

Standing at a distance, all the gopas and gopīs, including Rādhā, Lalitā, and Viśākhā, were also weeping. Somehow, they had been tolerating their separation from Kṛṣṇa while travelling from Vraja, and in Vraja, they were also somewhat tolerating. However, as they came nearer and nearer, their tolerance began to disappear, and they began to cry like babies.

Kṛṣṇa at once sat on the lap of Yaśodā-maiyā, and Baladeva Prabhu fell at the feet of Nanda Bābā. Seeing Kṛṣṇa, whom she had lost for years and years, all Yaśodā-maiyā’s separation mood, in the form of tears, began to flow out. She wept loudly, “My dear son! My dear son!” She covered Kṛṣṇa’s face as she had when He was a baby, and milk flowed automatically from her breasts. She covered Him as though He were a helpless, small baby, and she wept bitterly, so bitterly.

In Vṛndāvana, she had never wept as much as she did now. There she was like a statue, and her heart was dried up in separation. Kṛṣṇa had also been like dry wood or a stone, but now He also wept aloud. Nanda Bābā took Baladeva in his lap, and he began to weep, and it was a very piteous scene. Kṛṣṇa cried out, “Mother! Mother!” Baladeva Prabhu, sitting on the lap of Nanda Bābā, was crying out, “Father! Father!” and Nanda Bābā caressed him.

Having followed Kṛṣṇa, Vasudeva, Devakī, and Mother Rohiṇī arrived there, and Rohiṇī thought, “Oh, how very wonderful this situation is!” Kṛṣṇa had always been somewhat shy in front of Devakī. If He were hungry, He would tell Mother Rohiṇī – not Devakī – and now Devakī saw Him weep uncontrollably.

Devakī thought, “Kṛṣṇa never sat on my lap. He has never called me, ‘Mother, Mother.’ But now He is in the arms of Yaśodā, crying, ‘Mother, Mother, Mother.’ Yaśodā thinks, ‘Kṛṣṇa is my own son,’ and Kṛṣṇa also thinks, ‘My mother is only Yaśodā – not Devakī.’ Yaśodā will surely take Kṛṣṇa and return to Vraja. Kṛṣṇa will go forever, and He will never return to Dvārakā!”

She wanted to tell Yaśodā, “O Yaśodā, Kṛṣṇa is not your son. He is my son, but now He forgets me and accepts you as His real mother.” She also wanted to tell Kṛṣṇa, “You are not the son of Yaśodā. You are my son.” However, she could not say all this in the assembly of so many people, so she indirectly expressed her thoughts.

Being very intelligent, she said, “Oh, dear friend Yaśodā, you are wonderful and merciful. When we were in the prison of Kaṁsa, we could not support Kṛṣṇa. Then, hiddenly, we sent our son to Gokula – to you. Although He is my son, you have kept and supported Him. You have nourished Him better than anyone could nourish their own son. Although you knew that Kṛṣṇa is my son, you nourished Him as though He were yours. As the eyelids protect the most important part of the eyes – the pupils – you protected Kṛṣṇa. You never thought, ‘He is the son of Devakī.’ You saw Him only as your son. Therefore, I see that no one in the world is as merciful as you. You are very humble and broad-minded, and have served Him up to now. Because of this, He never remembers me. He always thinks that you are His mother.”

Rohiṇī saw that Devakī was trying to do something wrong – she was trying to come between Yaśodā and Kṛṣṇa. Rohiṇī wanted her not to disturb them. To trick her, she quickly said, “Oh, Mother Kuntī and so many more persons are waiting for you. We should go there.” She cleverly sent her away to welcome all the guests, and she also sent Vasudeva Mahārāja.

After some time, Yaśodā-maiyā became relieved, but she could not say anything. She could not say anything, and Kṛṣṇa was also in that condition. There was now only an exchange of moods – from heart to heart. Yaśodā then thought, “Outside, nearby, all the gopīs like Lalitā, Viśākhā, and Śrīmatī Rādhikā are waiting. They cannot meet Kṛṣṇa if I am here, and Nanda Bābā and Baladeva are also here.”

Until now, the gopīs were checking their moods of separation, and their lives remained in their bodies. Once they reached Kṛṣṇa, however, they could no longer tolerate a moment’s separation. They were about to die. Being very kind and generous, Mother Yaśodā thought, “They will die if I do not give them a chance at once. I must take everyone away from here by trick, and then the gopīs will come. If I delay, they will all die. They cannot tolerate the separation any longer.”

I remember an example from my boyhood, when I was fifteen. My father was a farmer. I went with him to a place far from my house, and there I picked a bundle of very delicious, beautiful green chickpeas. At first, I thought the bundle was very light, but when I reached the midway point, it became heavy, and as my village became nearer, I could not bear the weight. When I came into the village, I should have instantly fallen down, but somehow I persevered. When I reached the door of my house, however, I could not take the load inside. I dropped it outside.

This was also the case with the gopīs. When they were in Vraja, they were somehow tolerating separation, and as they travelled to Kṛṣṇa, their separation-feeling increased. Then, when they saw Kṛṣṇa but had no chance to meet Him because Yaśodā, Nanda Bābā, and others were with Him, they could not endure the separation at all. Yaśodā realised this fact, and she at once took the hand of Baladeva Prabhu. She put His fingers in her hand and, looking towards Nanda Bābā, told him, “Let us meet with the others.” Baladeva Prabhu was very intelligent and considered, “If I am here, the gopīs will not come.” He hurriedly left with His parents.

Yaśodā thus went to Devakī and embraced her, and some dialogue ensued. Nanda Bābā met with Vasudeva and others, and they also engaged in conversation.

* Kṛṣṇa is exactly ten years and eight months old when He leaves for Mathurā, but His transcendental body is like that of a full-grown kaiśora of fourteen or fifteen years.

** Unlike English, which has only full letters, Sanskrit words can contain full and half letters.

Source(s): Purebhakti.com

Image(s) made possible by Pixabay.com, Krishnapath.org.in and/or Bhaktiart.net
Unless indicated differently, all verse translations and quotes are from the books by Śrīla Prabhupāda (Vedabase.com)